It Might Be Love

Let’s go to the dark side, and see what the best leaders do when things turn for the worse. The thing is, when others are watching, there’s no place to hide.  So where do you go? It might be love, actually.

In This Week's Newsletter:

• THE ULLMEN INSIGHT: Explore how the best leaders rise during the toughest times—and why their secret might just be…. love, actually.

  • That’s the Takeaway: Flip the Hellyeah Switch.

• THE ULLMEN TRIO: Join John as he chats with Nelson Mandela and Georgia O’Keeffe on how love fuels leadership, from prisons to paintings.

THE ULLMEN INSIGHT

When things go badly, it can be hell to sit in the hot seat. That’s exactly when it’s most important to show up as an inspiring leader -- when the “Oh hell” Alarm sounds and people contract.

Think about how it feels on their end -- if their leader isn’t fully engaged & energized, what does that say to them? If you don’t exude passion & belief, why should they? 

No one needs VPs of Rigor Mortis!

Inspiring leaders need to look like they love their jobs. Not because they should, but because they do. And they do because they know their job always connects to something deeper, and something larger. 

Remember, your people can’t read your mind -- they need evidence that you’re all-in. Therefore, show consistently -- visibly & -- audibly that you care both about them & their worthwhile part in serving a larger purpose.

MAKING IT POSSIBLE

Connect their efforts to bigger picture outcomes. Tell them explicitly how what they’re doing contributes to the team, organization, customers, or community. 

Your communication should not be superficial, hyped, or contrived to look how you’re “supposed” to look. That’s cringey & draining. It’s fake, and self-lies cause self-loathing. 

Inspiring leaders find something to love about what they’re doing, who they’re doing it with, or who they’re doing it for. The mission, the work, the people. 

Good days or bad days, leaders find it & show it. They find it because it’s always there, solid & true, despite other things that change. 

It’s fully-realized, self-actualized & locked-in: In a life that’s precious but short, they’re grateful every day to care about others, and contribute to a cause that makes a difference. 

That doesn’t change when “Oh-hell” happens -- when things go wrong and times get tough.

As the 2003 hit movie Love Actually begins, we hear in voiceover the inner words from a leader with a demanding role, the Prime Minister (Hugh Grant), who can see more than others what’s wrong in the world. 

Still, he thinks: “If you look for it, I’ve got a sneaky feeling you’ll find love actually is all around.”

He’s right. It’s found all around, and most importantly, within. 

Inspiring leaders look like they love their jobs, because they love something even more than any job. 

They love life itself. 

We can all do that. Even if we “should”:)

That’s the Takeaway: Flip the Hellyeah Switch.

THE ULLMEN TRIO

This week John sits down to chat with Nelson Mandela and Georgia O’Keefe.

Thank you both for being here! What does love mean to each of you as a leader?

Nelson Mandela:
For me, love is a guiding principle of action. During my imprisonment on Robben Island, love sustained me—not just for my family, but for my country. This love transformed my cell into a classroom for leadership and helped us keep hope alive through shared dreams. Love means seeing potential in others, fostering unity, and putting others before yourself.

Once, I chose to see a cruel prison guard as a man shaped by fear. By caring, we slowly connected, showing me that love is an active choice, transforming individuals and systems. In leading South Africa, love guided me toward reconciliation, nurturing humanity in every individual.

Georgia O'Keeffe:
Nelson, your story showcases love's role in leadership. For me, love is about a deep connection with the world, expressed through my art in New Mexico. It drove me to capture the details of nature, teaching others to see beauty in simplicity. My leadership focuses on authenticity and inspires growth in others.

John Ullmen:
How can we apply love more as leaders?

Georgia O'Keeffe:
It starts with connecting deeply with your environment and those you lead. I spent time in nature, which helped me develop patience and clarity. Listening more than speaking and creating space for others to grow is key.

Nelson Mandela:
I relate to that. After prison, I understood that true leadership meant embracing diverse perspectives. I organized the National Peace Accord, engaging with those who opposed me, which fosters community and inclusiveness.

Georgia O'Keeffe:
Absolutely. Cultivating stillness is vital. In the chaos of leadership, we often miss the small signs of life. For example, I helped a struggling student focus on what she loved instead of trying to get it 'right.' We must ask, "Where is the love in this?"

Nelson Mandela:
Yes, stillness paired with courage is essential. We must step into uncomfortable spaces and take risks. Once, I visited the widow of an apartheid architect, demonstrating that love is not selective. It's about fostering unity, even when difficult.

John Ullmen:
Do you have any advice for today’s growing leaders regarding love in leadership?

Nelson Mandela:
Emphasize small gestures. I made tea for my staff daily, showing that love in leadership means serving others. These small acts of care can transform relationships.

Georgia O'Keeffe:
That's a beautiful perspective. My own experience with failing eyesight taught me about vulnerability. Letting others help me opened new dimensions in leadership, showing that love often involves accepting help and connecting deeply with others.

Nelson Mandela:
Never underestimate the power of forgiveness. After apartheid, inviting former adversaries to my inauguration was a profound act of love, showing that leadership is about healing and unity over division.

Georgia O'Keeffe:
Embrace vulnerability. My art reflected my struggles, and leaders can inspire trust by sharing their true selves. Love in leadership is found in small, sincere moments of honesty.

John Ullmen:
Thank you both for sharing your wisdom. Our listeners will take so much away from this conversation!

THE TRIO TAKEAWAYS